What Cops Really Think Of Us

This past summer, I spent a day at the Allen County courthouse as a witness in a trial. After I gave my testimony, I was asked to remain outside the courtroom in case the prosecutor needed to recall me to the stand. Two other trial witnesses were seated there with me, and there was a pair of police officers standing by the benches. The Allen County officer was there on official business, to guard the door to the courtroom. I believe that the FWPD officer was there as a witness in the trial.

One of the witnesses, a neighbor of mine, began a casual conversation with the officers. Myself and the other witness remained silent throughout the discussion. Keep in mind that since I had been “asked” by the prosecutor to remain nearby, I was effectively a captive audience here. My neighbor is a security guard, so their conversation initially revolved around their common interests in guns, ammunition, dogs and the like. The county officer was leading the conversation from the beginning, and the city officer actually said very little. As the county officer’s enthusiasm increased, the city officer eventually pulled out of the conversation entirely.

I think the first sign that something was not quite right was when someone stepped out of the courtroom and told “us” to keep things quiet. The second sign was when he stepped out again to chastise the county officer (who was supposed to be guarding the door) for having just allowed an unauthorized person to walk into a closed courtroom. The third oddity was a few minutes later when someone else tried to walk into the closed courtroom.

This was really odd because the officer was talking so much that he wasn’t paying attention to the door - again. The person actually had their hand on the door and was about to enter before he abruptly stopped them. And he didn’t just tell them that they weren’t allowed to enter the room. Rather, he recalled for them how he had just been chastised for not doing his job and stated that he wasn’t going to let that happen again. I’ve never guarded a courtroom before, but it seems to me that a simple and quiet “I’m sorry, no one is allowed to enter the courtroom at this time” would have been much more professional.

It was obvious that this guy had a lot on his mind, enough to distract him from doing his job and enough that he didn’t even seem to realize that at some point everyone but him had stopped talking. During his speech, I believe he mentioned that he had recently returned from Iraq or Afghanistan. If that was so, then I felt it was enough to excuse his slightly bizarre behavior. Up to this point he had been a little less than professional in his demeanor, but had said nothing really offensive. I’m more than willing to forgive that from a man who has been fighting my country’s battles. But then things got really weird.

It was shortly after he told us which guns were best for killing people that he began to proffer his political opinions. As he began to spew what could only be described as strong anti Second Amendment rhetoric, it occurred to me that he really had no business forcing me to listen to his idiotic views. For a moment, I was nearly compelled to stand up and challenge his rhetoric, but I decided someone needed to maintain the decorum. So I continued to sit and listen to see where he was headed.

I believe it was at the point when he said “I want to be ready when the zombies rise up” that the City officer abruptly walked away from the area. Cops are usually pretty good at hiding their thoughts when they want to, but I’m sure I caught a slight hint of “Oh my God, I can’t believe what this fucking moron is saying. I’d better step back before someone tries to connect the two of us” on his face as he turned to leave.

I can’t recall the exact words of the county officer, but his thought process went something like this: He doesn’t believe that civilians should have access to real guns, the kind that would put them on par with the police. He made no mention of restricting only certain classes of people, such as criminals, so it appears as though it was a blanket wish to cover all of society (except for cops, of course.)

The reason he doesn’t want an armed citizenry is because he expects them one day to rise up en mass and challenge the police. It is important to note here that he also said nothing to indicate that he expected his imagined mob to only include a few criminal outcasts. In fact, his failure to employ any transitional language at all between stating that the entire non-police population should be effectively disarmed and referring to the mass of zombies rising up against him indicates that it is in fact society at large that he views as the zombies.

So I’m setting there listening to this fucking lunatic rambling about how he wants to take away my guns so that when me and the rest of the unwashed masses rise up against him he can easily murder us. And I’m starting to think to myself; if an armed person walks up to you and says they are going to disarm you; then they tell you they think you are going attack them (even though you have said or done nothing to indicate this); then they tell you they want to murder you for your future offense of rising up against them; wouldn’t that in fact make you the one being attacked?

And cops wonder why the whole world doesn’t love them.